HOORAY FOR HOLYROOD?

Who can tell me what this picture is? Is it -

a) the hoops a filmmaker in Scotland has to jump through?
b) the bike rack outside the Parliament building?

When it comes to the proposed Scottish Culture Bill, can anybody be arsed? Well, Davie Hutchison can. The other day I stumbled on his blog -

northtoleith.blogspot.com/2006_12_01_archive.html

Davie goes some way to explain the machinations of the Executive when it comes to legislation affecting the future of Scottish Screen. He also thinks the bill is deader than a Bernard Matthew turkey roast. As he says –

“No matter which way you look at it the Culture Bill that has been published is dead in the water. Even if it was re-introduced Dr Richard Holloway admitted on Newsnight Scotland last night that it would be May 2009 before the legislation was passed! Never mind when Creative Scotland would actually be set up. Leaving the sector in limbo for yet another 2 years”.

If that’s the case - and even if it isn’t - can anybody tell me why the joint board of Creative Scotland is a done deal? How is it possible to have a board for a body that doesn’t exist? You don’t hear Doc Holloway querying the legality of that, not when he’s just been appointed as its chairman.

Like all politicians, what Davie doesn’t know is that when it comes to limbo, filmmakers here are experts in bending over, be it backwards or in other, more submissive ways. So with an election round the corner, aspiring MSPs ought to realise there’s plenty of votes in them thar arty types, disgruntled by the way culture, and film especially is being downgraded both as a business and a way to fly the saltire.

So for any politicians reading this, here’s a few ideas, because it strikes me that apart from renting a DVD at the weekend, you guys know hee-haw about film.

1 - Why can’t we have a National Cinema for Scotland? One that’s run by filmmakers for filmmakers, not 55 admin staff. If Vicki Featherstone at the National Theatre of Scotland can have total artistic freedom and the autonomy to spend millions of pounds of taxpayer’s money, why can’t filmmakers have the same deal? And like the NTS, don’t expect the NCS to turn a profit either. The numbers show that most European films don’t make money – why should Scotland be an exception?

2 - Why can’t Scotland introduce tax and other financial incentives for filmmakers, whether from here or abroad? If Ireland can inject 188 million Euro into film, why can’t Scotland? If bringing in Hollywood films is as good for the economy as politicians like to claim, then why wouldn’t they invest more in that, rather than chuck money at dodgy asset-stripping electronics multinationals who up and leave as soon as the handouts dry up? At least with movies, you get a lasting legacy that brings in the tourists year after year.

3 - Why can’t local authorities charge a levy on multiplex cinemas to fund homegrown films from ticket sales? And while you’re at it, get a commitment to show them too. Cineworld in Renfrew Street has 18 screens – one screen for Scottish or UK films could make a big difference to getting local films seen.

4 - Why can’t we have a proper film studio? For years dodgy schemes have come and gone and we’re still waiting. A PFI initiative for a massive out-of-town shed would be a start, plus it would go a long way to encouraging big budget movies out of London. And no, I don’t mean Film City, because the Glasgow Social Work department’s still there and anyway, it’s not a real studio. There’s not even a sign outside that says Film City, at least not the last time I went by.

I could go on, but unlike many a politician, I know when to get off my soap box.