OBI WAN KEN NOBODY

If I fell over Ken Hay in Princes Street, I'd be none the wiser. Who, you ask?

Scottish Screen's new boss, Ken Hay, who took up the job in April, has spent the last six months finding out what his job is. Months ago The Scotsman reported some early rumblings from Ken about how short films don't get seen, don't make money and how filmmakers are to blame. He also thinks the future lies in video virals and even radio (?) and that unemployed writers should be scripting for games. Gee, I had no idea they were hiring...

So why do I feel this is bad juju for film? Possibly because in his recent outing for the press, Ken has pretty much admitted that film is dead.

Wannabe filmmakers, me and people like me, who've done some training and who make their own luck still look to Scottish Screen for support. I'm not alone in making shorts and writing scripts in the hope that one day I and my fellow filmmakers will rise up the queue. If Scottish Screen don't want to make shorts where does that leave us? If they don't want to put money into features either then why are they in charge of zillions of Lottery dosh?

Unless of course they give it to telly companies, but they do that already and there's no point in complaining. TV looks like a safe bet, whether it's Tartan Shorts, New Found Land, This Scotland, Tartan Smalls, New Found Films. But I wish they would just be more honest when they say they want to nurture new talent.

Nurture. Interesting word.

It sounds kind of cuddly and warm but what it actually means in this case is manipulate because anyone with half a brain knows it's about cheapo content. Apart from Tartan Shorts, a long-running scheme with high budgets, the others are risible - 50K for a half hour drama on NFL, 17K for 30 minute documentaries, 300K for features. These are supported by TV - a win-win for both the broadcasters and SS, because their stranglehold on new, hungry filmmakers squeezes out any risk, anything new, anything creative - all the things that telly hates.

But Ken's hedging his bets. By putting out feelers to the media, he's letting us know what he wants to do. But he won't announce anything concrete until the New Year. Eight months of sitting on the fence is sure to leave a dent somewhere. Me, I envy him. There can't be many jobs where you can get paid a high five figure wage for doing eff all...